I am capable of manipulating matter and energy on a subatomic level by speaking. A mere flick of my finger is sufficient to alter the gravitational pull of the planet. I shelve physics texts under ‘Fiction’ in the library, I consider the laws of thermodynamics loose guidelines at best. In short, I am grasping the reins of the universe’s carriage, and every morning I wake up, look to the heavens, and shout, ‘Giddy up, boy!’ You many never grasp the complexities of what I do, but at least have the common courtesy to feign something other than slack-jawed oblivion in my presence. I, sir, am a wizard, and I break more natural laws before breakfast than of which you are even aware.

(via urban-pooka)

(via urban-pooka)

Source: tripleoverhead

Source: dreamingtobegreat

Elves are wonderous. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvelous. They cause marvels. 
Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies. 
Elves are glamorous. They project glamour. 
Elves are enchanting. They weave enchantment. 
Elves are terrific. They beget terror. 
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes, look behind words that have changed their meaning. 
No one ever said elves are nice. 
Elves are bad.